The object of teaching a child is to enable him to get along without his teacher.
~Elbert Hubbard


I have been thinking a lot recently about being brainwashed. I mean seriously, have you considered how easy it is to be brainwashed in this media crazed world we live in? Several years ago I stopped listening to rap music. I know… the thought of me listening to rap music is odd; odder still is the thought of me dancing to it in my car. I had moves… moves that George describes as seizure-like! I gave it up… but I do miss ‘the moves’.

Why did I give up rap music? Well, as you can imagine, the lyrics are really bad. The music is good (to me), but the message is B-A-D! I was at a point in my life where my convictions were being challenged greatly on a daily basis and the message I was getting on my 45 minute commute to & from work was not reinforcing my values. In fact, the message was making me ‘long’ to straddle the fence just enough to feel like a normal person; live my 20’s with gusto! What I knew in my heart never changed though and I eventually realized either the music had to go or my values did because the fact of the matter was ‘Ludicris’ was brainwashing me… and I was letting him.

You may have missed the big news, but I am a mama now. Crazy, isn’t it? It was a shock to me as well… a BIG shock! I try to be very purposeful in raising Andrew. I try to keep focused on the big picture… the man he becomes. I want him to realize and receive all the things the Lord has planned for his life. I would love to be the mother of the next Billy Graham. Maybe he will be musically inclined and win a DOVE award? Or maybe he will be a software developer and teach Sunday school or just be a greeter for the morning service? I don’t know what the Lord has for his life, but he has something and I want him to seek it out.

So, how do I guide him in his journey? Well, for starters we go to church – Sunday School too. We listen to children’s church songs on the car, watch Veggie Tales, say the blessing before dinner and say a prayer before bed. He has come to expect these things and can even say the prayer with me at night (although rather unclear) and don’t even get me started on the way he holds my hand, bows his head and says ‘Amen’ at dinner. Have you any idea how hard it is not to consume that child!

Most of you would say this makes me a good parent and for the most part I would agree – at least I try to be a good parent. But, what would you say of the Muslim family across the street that uses every opportunity to instill Muslim values into the lives of their Children? You would probably wouldn’t rush to call them good parents; although if pressed you may have a hard time putting your reasons into words.

I have heard it said many times and have actually said it myself – these children are brainwashed. We have no problem believing that children raised in homes that preach values drastically different from our own are brainwashed. So, doesn’t that mean that I am brainwashing Andrew? Wow, that’s a very hard thought. It came to me about a month ago and caused me to sit and really think about it.

I’m a Christian… I know what believe and more importantly, I know why I believe it. I have always known the ‘what’… always. I have known the ‘what’ because my parents and people near & dear to me told me the ‘what’ over and over and over again. But, the ‘what’ doesn’t get you very far in life, does it?

I am firm believer that you cannot truly believe something until you have questioned it. I cannot simply take what I have been taught my entire life and assume that in this world full of trials and temptations, those ’whats’ would prevail without a ‘why’! I cannot tell you how many times I have sat in silence with a piece of my faith, a conviction, a truth and questioned whether it was ‘The Truth’ or just ‘good teaching’. The key to questioning what you believe is having an open heart for the answer. This is how you get to the ‘Why’!

So, as I sat in silence asking whether I am being a good parent or whether I am brainwashing my child, God revealed my journey to me. It wasn’t long before I knew with assurance that I am not brainwashing Andrew – I am giving him the ‘what’. It is up to him to find the ‘why’.

Do you know what you believe? More importantly, do you know why you believe it?

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old,

he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:6

George and I got a family bible as a wedding gift, which happens to be one of my favorite gifts. Growing up in the Bible Belt, I thought everyone had a family bible sitting on the living room table. I have come to find out that is not the case. When I moved into this house, we had only the TV stand to actually call a 'table' and it wasn't an appropriate place for a bible. So, I am sad to report that until recently it has been tucked away nicely in the top of the closet in the guest bedroom. Thankfully, this weekend our long awaited formal living room furniture arrived and out came the family bible to take its rightful place. Even better is the fact that I quickly found a use for it... we are actually reading it as a family!

We started 'Resurrection Eggs' with Andrew this week. By we, I mean 'I' since George is traveling and I am flying solo with the kid this week. I have been anxiously awaiting doing this with Andrew since I heard of them last year. I went to get them a week before Easter and they were all sold out, this year I got them early and have been waiting. I decided that I would do 1 egg a night for the 12 days leading up to Easter finishing the night before. I think trying to cram all 12 eggs into one day would be too much for Andrew. Having completed 2 nights, I realize it would be too much for me!

Have you heard of 'Resurrection Eggs'? Fascinating concept, I think. Twelve plastic eggs, each filled with something representative of one aspect of the Easter story. There is an accompanying book that give a scripture the egg is in reference to and a short explanation. Egg #12 is a golden egg and is empty representing, of course, the empty tomb! I am in love with these eggs, I seriously am.

Clearly stated on the box are the words 'For ages 3 & up.'... puh-leeze! Andrew loves story time and this would be a variation of story time, right? I know he is only 22 months, but I have a plan. We can handle one egg a night for twelve nights; we're a model family, after all. Here is how it all went down...


We went to the living room (as a side note, how many people find it odd that we actually sat in the living room - the one room you were never allowed in as a child because it would get messed up and.... the horror... company would foot prints on the freshly vacuumed carpet!). Again, we went into the living room and I opened the booklet and opened the bible to the scripture for egg #1. All the while, Richard is running around barking loudly, jumping on me, jumping on Andrew, but knowing his life was in danger if he jumped on the new furniture! Mind you, Andrew is neither interested in the booklet, the bible or the dog. No, he is interested in this...


I was seriously trying not get frustrated and remember that he is not even 2 years old yet. The box did tell me 'ages 3 & up' after all! I read the scripture, fully aware that I was reading to myself. Thinking back on it, I wonder why I took the time to convert 'Ass' to 'Donkey' while reading since he was oblivious to the Word of God anyway! Thankfully, they only give you 2-3 verses to read and then you can open your egg to see what has been hidden inside. What was inside the blue egg?

A Donkey... of course! And that one blue egg and enclosed donkey was all that Andrew was concerned with. He couldn't care less about the remaining 11 eggs, just the one blue egg. It was as if he knew we were on 'Day 1' and day 1 was the blue egg. Oh, he is a good little student; I have raised him right! Perhaps I got ahead of myself since at some point I think he threw the donkey and the egg from one side of the room to the other.

Finally (thankfully), the end of our 'lesson' was drawing near. I pulled Andrew close and told him we were going to say a prayer. It only seems appropriate that we should end in a prayer, right?Why did I put myself through this? Well, I had good intentions but I was so flustered at that point that I actually found myself thanking the Lord for donkey's and thanked Jesus for his son... Jesus. I had to laugh... I am so glad that God knows our hearts, aren't you?

You may be thinking that Day 1 wound up being the last day, but it wasn't. We gathered around the pink egg last night which contained silver coins and we talked about how Judas betrayed Jesus for 30 silver coins. Again, Andrew only cared about that pink egg and its contents. We played with the egg for several minutes and then we ended in prayer which went somewhat better... somewhat!

I don't expect Andrew to come out of this in 2 weeks knowing the Easter story. But he is smart and he picks things up very quickly. He knows you aren't supposed to eat before you say a blessing, you aren't supposed to go to bed without saying a prayer and when you ask him where Jesus is, he points to the sky and his heart. He doesn't understand the why of everything right now, but one day, I pray he will. For now, I am simply preparing the field for rain.

Who Dat? Dat's ME!!!!!

This past weekend was the biggest sporting event of the year – I’ll give you one guess as to what it was! Correct, the Super Bowl! Did you watch it? We were able to catch the first half and the fourth quarter (all that really matters). We had to leave the party we were at during half time to get Andrew home and in bed on time. We are on a strict schedule these days and I am so happy and proud of it that I would walk home from any party, anywhere just to keep him on said schedule.

This Super Bowl has really been heavily promoted since the New Orleans Saints have never even made an appearance at the Super Bowl much less win one. In the weeks leading up to the event, things were pretty lively in my neck of the woods. Living in Houston, not far from Louisiana, there are many Saints fans. People who aren’t die-hard fans tended to lean that direction given the choice. It was a huge deal, and in the end, the Saints pulled off a victory. Don’t we all love a Cinderella story?

Well, all the talk and excitement leading up to and immediately following the game kept me rather excited too. Not because I am a huge Saints for or even a Super Bowl fan – my heart will always be in college football. No, my excitement was due in part to what the Saints brought with them… endless variations of ‘When the Saints Go Marching In’. It’s been stuck in my head for weeks!!

I am sure you heard this classic hymn at some point over the last 2 weeks. I got up early one day last week to join the 5:15 a.m. spin class at the YMCA. I will tell you right now, I am not a pretty sight at that time in the morning. The instructor hopped on her bike and announced she had a surprise for us. As soon as the zydeco started playing, I knew what was coming. There it was at 5:15 on a weekday morning when all the people who had brains were still sleeping and I was singing ‘When the Saints Go Marching In’ with a bunch of other crazy folks.

I sang that song until I nearly cried… for several reasons, not the least of which because that little seat and my big seat no longer match up correctly! It was such a happy, fun moment though because we all knew the song (and I am sure at least half of the folks thought it was written specifically for the New Orleans Saints); we sang loud and in unison. Right smack dab in the middle of the sang a chant bursts out – this was a verse I wasn’t familiar with – this piece was written specifically for the Saint’s. It goes like so “Who dat say they gonna beat dem Saint’s? Who Dat? Who Dat?” (Cajun accent used here) – very catchy. I caught on and kept the pace with the rest of the group for the remainder of the song.

I consider myself very blessed for many reasons, but none more than this… When the Saints go marching in, I not only want to be in that number, but I WILL be in that number. I settled that issue a long time ago, as did many of you. I live with many regrets in my life and long for ‘do-over’s’, but because of the blood of Christ, I am a saint, part of a royal priesthood and on that day, I will go marching in. Isn’t that the greatest thing you have heard in a very long time?

George and I have had a lot of fun with this song in the last week. We have danced all over our house singing both the traditional hymn and the ‘Who Dat’ addition. We feel the need to include the ‘Who Dat’ portion to our dance routine because it’s really a lot of fun and frankly, in the end, the Saints do indeed win! It’s been great having this song stuck in my head because it has been a constant reminder of who I am in Christ. The world is a constant reminder of who I am in flesh and of past mistakes, but ultimately I am a child of God, marching upward to Zion.

What about you? Is this just a catchy song that you know but have no clue as to what it really means? Do you assume you are a Saint because you were raised in America and we are a (supposed) Christian nation? Will you be marching in with the other Saints on that day or are you just not sure? Some would tell you that there is no real way to know, you live life as a good person and hope for the best. I am telling you that simply isn’t true, but the free gift of Jesus is too simple to pass up. The knowing and peace that comes from accepting that gift is better than any blessing you have on this earth, or will ever have – I promise you that. If you aren’t certain of your marching orders, then follow the link below for the simple steps to being a ‘Saint’… and SING!

http://www.chick.com/information/general/salvation.asp

Habakkuk Revisited

My last entry was on 9/11 and, as is the usual start to each entry, I began with a verse I found appropriate. The verse I choose for that day was Habakkuk 3:16-19 and it seemed to capture the reality of September 11 accurately. Oddly enough, I have not been able to escape those verses since that post. I am literally meditating on them daily and I so I feel the need to stop and re-examine them once more. I will post them again, this time beginning in verse 17.

Even though the fig trees have no blossoms, and there are no grapes on the vine; even though the olive crop fails, and the fields lie empty and barren; even though the flocks die in the fields, and the cattle barns are empty, yet I will rejoice in the LORD! I will be joyful in the God of my salvation. The Sovereign LORD is my strength! He will make me as surefooted as a deer and bring me safely over the mountains.

What thoughts did you have as you read and finished the scripture? I was transported back to several times in my life when my soul cried these very words even though I wasn’t aware of the scripture. I believe that this is the place that the Lord needs to take you to so that he can begin to use you for the purpose you were created. I heard a pastor say once ‘In order for the Lord to use you greatly, he must first break you greatly’. I believe that if you are a child of God, He will break you and if you withstand the hurt, your soul will cry the words of Habakkuk.

I do not know of one person that wishes pain, fear or turmoil on themselves. I also do not know of one person who has not experienced it at some point. Hard times are a fact a life; there is nothing we can do to avoid it if we live long enough. The ‘experience’ has to be so bad that there seems to be no earthly escape to cry the words of Habakkuk and mean them with all your heart.

Do you know why Habakkuk could rejoice in the Lord? Do you have any clue why he was joyful and found strength in the Lord? He knew Peace. How many times have we prayed that God would give someone the peace that passes all understanding? We sometimes throw that around very nonchalantly without realizing the power in its reality.

I have been at the bottom, have you? Who was there? Sure, there was someone there physically – your parents, children, friends or a spouse, but who was there to pick you up? None of those people, not if you were at the bottom. There is only one person who is there to pick you up and you know he is there because of Peace. Peace lifts your eyes first then your head. Peace brings you to your knees and then your feet. Peace gives you strength lift your hands and then Peace slowly but surely pulls you up.

Your situation may be the same, but Peace has given you a new set of glasses to see through. It’s a hard fight to get those glasses, but what a view. You turn around and look where you were and you never want to go there again, but you wouldn’t change it if you could. This is the sweet spot. You can’t imagine it until God has brought you here, but He will bring you. He will make you surefooted and you will rejoice in Him.

I have been through the valley and I have stood on the mountain. If I live long enough, I will experience both again. I like the mountain much, much more than the valley. It is the valley, however, that has given me strength. It is the valley that has prepared me for my purpose. Do I know what my purpose is? No. Maybe I will find out tomorrow, maybe not. Perhaps I will just live it and never realize it. Regardless, I don’t want to miss it. I have been and am being prepared for it, so are you. Life is good, but life is hard. I will rejoice in the Lord because he is sovereign and is my strength.

I trembled inside when I heard all this; my lips quivered with fear. My legs gave way beneath me, and I shook in terror. I will wait quietly for the coming day when disaster will strike the people who invade us. Even though the fig trees have no blossoms, and there are no grapes on the vine; even though the olive crop fails, and the fields lie empty and barren; even though the flocks die in the fields, and the cattle barns are empty, yet I will rejoice in the LORD! I will be joyful in the God of my salvation. The Sovereign LORD is my strength! He will make me as surefooted as a deer and bring me safely over the mountains. Habakkuk 3:16-19

Today is September 11 and at some point today we will be forced to remember the events that took place 8 years ago. I say you will be forced, maybe that only applies to me. You see, those events are sad and I don’t do sad. I ignore sad at all cost. I try very hard to live by the ‘turn-that-frown-upside-down’ mentality. I will have to be forced to think about that tragic day. I suppose since I am writing about it now, this is the forceful moment.

September 11th was the JFK assignation of my generation. We all remember where we were and what we were doing that morning. I was living in VA at the time and was at the doctor’s office having my knee x-rayed; tendonitis. Ty was visiting that week and we had tickets to the Aerosmith concert in VA Beach on the 12th. It was the second time we had planned to see Aerosmith – the first time the concert was canceled so that Steven Tyler could have knee surgery.

I was lying there on the table with that heavy xray vest on my chest when the technician walked in and said the 2nd tower had been hit. I already knew the first tower was hit and when news came of the second, I couldn’t wrap my mind around what had happened. I said ‘What is going on, can’t those pilots see the towers?’ I assumed the planes were small crop duster planes carrying 2-3 passengers total. I never imagined the reality of it all.

I left the doctor’s office and headed to work listening to the coverage all the way. I soon realized, like the rest of America, that this was a serious threat to our nation. We were under attack, and never was I so glad to work in a one story building. We had a small TV in the front of the office that everyone crowded around to watch the coverage and about 30 minutes in, I knew I couldn’t take anymore. Eight years later, I still cannot watch the coverage. It took months to get the images out of my head of those people jump out of the window 100+ stories in the air.
News soon came that all sporting events, concerts and flight were canceled. I wasn’t headed to a sporting event, but I was headed to a concert and Ty was scheduled to fly home at the end of the week. I called Ty to tell him the concert was canceled and I was very upset about this. I needed normalcy and fun. I needed to go to a concert where there weren’t images of planes blowing up and people dying by the thousands. I needed an escape, without it my frown couldn’t be turned upside down.

By Friday of that week, the nation was slowly moving forward. Bush Gardens opened up and Ty and I enjoyed a day of roller coasters and funnel cakes. We observed a moment of silence at noon and that was about all I could muster. The next day, Ty rented a car and headed back to Florida. Life moved on.

We have come a long way since that day. Former President Bush went from being beloved to being hated. We went from being united to being divided. We are safe yet feel very vulnerable knowing that another attack is always one breath away. We know it could very well be us or our loved ones who suffer next time. We cling to our God, yet we ask why?

We will never know the answer to why God allows such tragedy in our lives, especially mass tragedy like 9/11. We know God allows things for a reason, and it is that promise and many others we find in His word that help us move forward with peace. I especially have to immerse myself in these promises, otherwise I find myself living bound by fear, unable to participate in the joys of life. You may find yourself living the same way.

Where does this leave me today? I have learned to remind myself as often as needed of the reality of knowing Jesus. Regardless of what happens in my life, this is only temporary. I will spend eternity with Jesus. If God takes away everything & everyone I know and love; I still have Jesus. If I am left with no choice but to throw myself from the 100th floor of a building, I can assure you that Jesus will be the last person I call out to on my way down… and it is He that will catch me at the bottom.

I have never watched the footage of 9/11 since that day. I have never again tried to see Aerosmith in concert. I have never again dreamed of working in a high rise building. I have never again taken a flight without thinking of what may happen. I didn’t lose anyone on that day, but like you and every other American out there, I lost a piece of innocence. We are forever changed and regardless of the issues in our nation today, I am very proud to be an American and pray God’s blessings on us daily.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9


So today is a rough day for me. I really thought today was going to be a great day since I was able to get into a pair of 6 size pants and a shirt I haven’t been able to get on since Andrew was 4 months enutero. This led to an anxiety free morning, sweet kisses from Andrew as I left him at school, the perfect latte to be followed by a little piece of heaven, aka a Vanilla Bean Scone.

I arrived at work to find my boss packing up his office. Much to the surprise of everyone, he was let go this morning and had only minutes to leave the building. I am sure it wasn’t that dramatic, since his dismissal had nothing to do with anything unethical, but it seemed that dramatic. I never got the chance to say anything, not a word, his light was just off and he was gone. And I am sad.

I spent about an hour trying to keep a straight face. I was in and out of meetings, sitting with the director and then with my interim manger and others in my team. All the while I was so angry about this, just sad... and angry. Then I heard a still, small voice reminding me that my boss and I serve the same God. Here we go, yet another teachable moment.

My boss was totally taken by surprise this morning, as was I, but the Lord wasn’t. The Lord knew the day He gave him this job that one day He would take it away. Doesn’t that seem so unfair? Well, it is… if you are of the flesh. God doesn’t work in realm of fair or common sense. God works in the realm of perfection – we just haven’t a clue sometimes.

The last 3 months on my previous job were a nightmare. Then I got laid off. Then I spent 3 months unemployed. Then I spent 6 months doing clerical work and fetching coffee for people. Then God said “Here, I hope you like this gift”; what a blessing this job is! Just to type it makes me smile.

God is so faithful. He loves us and knows what is best for us. Sometimes He puts us in difficult spots, but only because that’s what it takes to obtain His perfection. I may never understand why my boss is no longer here, but I know it was for the best. It was for his best and I praise the One who holds us both in His hand.

Jesus loves the little children
All the children of the world
Black and yellow, red and white
They're all precious in His sight
Jesus loves the little children of the world

Don’t you love this song?! Did your mama sing this to you when you were little or did you sing it at church? I sing this to Andrew every night while rocking him to sleep. The words are so familiar to me since I, like many of you, grew up singing it. Not until I started singing it to my baby, however did the song take on a new meaning.

It is not difficult for me to see the truth in these words when I look at Andrew. He is sweet, with chubby little cheeks. He has 8 little gappy teeth standing like good little soldiers through his baby grin. His new tactic for making love him is how he interacts with our dog, Richard. Andrew loves Richard as much as any boy could love his dog. The mere sight of that doggie makes his cackle out loud. I catch him from time to time lying with his head on Richard’s bed, face to face with our canine love just carrying on the most interesting of conversations. Well, Andrew thinks it’s interesting anyway. So, who couldn’t love a child like that?

When I sing this song, however, it is not Andrew’s face that I see. I see the faces of children who I have never met, have never seen. I see children in India, China, Uganda and other places whose countries name I could never spell. I see juveniles who have been given up on and adults who are in prison. I see children, people who are not all that loveable and then I smile.

Why do I smile? I smile because it is this simple little children’s song that reminds me how great a love the father has lavished upon us. I smile because God has once again reminded me that I am called to love the unlovely. I smile because I am worthy, and so are you because we are loved.

I have a coworker who I am very fond of. I actually have several coworkers that I am very fond of and pray for daily. You see, I am surrounded by Muslims at my office. They are nice, funny, and considerate; a complete 180˚ from what we have grown to fear. This one particular coworker has just become a first time father. His wife miscarried last year and this pregnancy was no cake walk. He was ecstatic the day his daughter arrived, safely.

When I read the birth announcement I had such mixed emotions. It was much like a Christians would be, except Allah was used a lot rather than God or Lord. I was thankful that she arrived safe, but saddened that she would not be raised to know Jesus. Isn’t that just like we humans? To think that the only way a child can grow up to know the Lord is to be born into a Christian home!?

Read the words to that song again. Smile & rejoice! There is hope in those 5 little lines. That baby was born for a purpose. Jesus loves her and has a purpose for her just as he has a purpose for Andrew and for you and me. It is up to her to seek out her purpose and up to Andrew to seek out his purpose. It is up to me to continue to pray that they will do just that as I continue to seek my purpose.

Do you write people off as a lost cause because of what they look like or where they come from? What a tragedy. Jesus loves the little children. Isn’t it funny how sometimes God uses the most minor of things, such as a children’s song to remind us of who He is.